Honor the Life You Shared

This week's topic is one I really believe is true more than anything and I think it is a great way to remember the person that you have lost. We and those that loved John have done so many amazing things to honor him. I joke that John is in 2 containers because all of his ashes didn’t fit into one. I never have figured out what to do with the majority of his ashes so they are still in the black plastic container from the funeral home, it isn’t because I don't want something special for him but because I just cannot decide what is the best container for him. However, a friend of John’s who runs a funeral home said to me it is good that he is in 2 containers because I have one that holds the majority of him and one I can do things with, we have taken this smaller container with us a few places and for a while I just drove around with him in my car. We took him to OBX with us and threw some of his ashes into the ocean with friends. I have a small urn that is going down to his old office for them to share and so he will always be there. I also would like to leave some in the garden that honors him down there. I have put the container of his ashes in several different places for photos. I have a highlighted collection of stories titled
“Where is John” I had a necklace made with a fingerprint.

Other things that we have done, my mom took some of his t-shirts and made pillows out of them which each of us have one. She also took 3 of his button up work shirts and made us each a teddy bear. I have often thought of opening them up and putting some of his ash in them as well but I haven’t done this yet. When the kids and I go to Arizona later this month to visit friends I plan on leaving some of him there because when I am there I feel him which is strange because he never went there but

Here is a list of some of the ways you could honor the one you lost. Working through your grief in a way that honors the person you lost is a special way of also making sure they are not forgotten. This could include the few things listed below and so many more:

• Creating a memory box filled with photos, letters, or mementos.

• Planting a tree or garden in their memory.

• Writing a letter to your spouse expressing what you’re feeling.

• Continuing traditions that were special to both of you.

By remembering the love and life you shared, you can keep their spirit alive in a way that brings you comfort rather than just pain. My kids and I do many things thought out the year to carry on John’s traditions and hope that these ideas help you figure out the best way to honor the one you lost.